Between Two Worlds

Between two worlds between two loves
One that is here and one that floods
There was a time I was shrinking back
When I would say we'll get there when the red turns to black
I would smile, I would nod
and just say we're trusting God
But in His Presence God spoke
and said it's ok to feel like you are choked
The passion you have is the other end
It's exactly where I want you, friend
I want you trusting me here
and desiring there
dance with me today
and tonight be in the fray
For there is no other way for you to grow
when you have no other place to go
than on your face waiting for each step
as you live between this chapter and what's next

Kristin Choitz
2015

REST

My verse for 2015

Entering 2015 has been precarious. I moved into 2015 shedding 2014 but with the effects of it still attached like snake skin I am trying to rid myself of. I pray that I would be able to let that which is following me, the hurt, pain, suffering and agony, fall into the hands of my Father in Heaven. I think part of me wanted to spring into this new year with boldness, prayers answered, the path to Zambia sealed and all relationships in my life singing the glories of reconciliation, repentance and honor. That is not where I find myself.

Last year I sat quietly hearing God say that 2014 was going to be tough, that it was going to be really hard. I couldn't imagine how things could get worse but they did.

As with previous years, I continue to learn that God wants me at His feet and in His presence. That is enough. He wants me to REST in Him. That is my word for this year.

It is ironic that God has given me this word in what will probably be the busiest of any year on record. The year we will move to Zambia. It is not a mistake though. This REST is not the kind in which I will find myself by an ocean reading a good book. It is the REST I will experience in Him, in His presence in the middle of the storm. The REST I will accept in our calling and our service to our Lord and Savior. The place where I will worship God for, despite and because of everything going on in my life.

I have been studying Ezekiel and keep landing on the phrase, "The glory of the Lord". I wanted to study that a little more so I reached out for a pastor friend of mine and he gave me some verses to read. One of which was Exodus 33:14-"The Lord replied, 'My PRESENCE will go with you, and I will give you REST." He did not know my word for the year but God used him to confirm where He wants me. Resting in His glory.

As I claim 2015 for Zambia (and REST in God to get us there), I do so with a vision in my heart for Chibolya, which means graveyard. A vision for Chiboyla to be given a new name through the powerful love of Jesus and His resurrection power where He overcame death so that this hopeless community in Chongwe, Zambia could be given a new name and people freed from bondage and the old name thrown off for the glory of God! That I will REST in.

Blessings to everyone as we march, crawl, slip, jump, bound, run, walk or sail into 2015!

Remembering 2014

While I am looking forward to the new year of 2015, I felt God directing me to look back. To look back to last year at this time when I was sitting quietly, asking God about 2014. Wondering what the year would hold and what God wanted to show me. God asks the Israelites to do this often, He asks them to remember what He did, to look back. In Joshua chapter 4 the Israelites took 12 stones out of the Jordan river that they had just crossed and set them up at Gilgal so that, "In the future when your descendants ask their fathers, 'What do these stones mean?' tell them, 'Israel crossed the Jordan on dry ground."

Remembering, looking back, at what God has done allows us to remember who He is. God is faithful, holy, just, righteous, merciful and sovereign. I remember wanting 2013 to be over last year at this time, I remember asking God what 2014 was going to hold for me (I was hoping it would be better than 2013)....I was not so excited with His answer. "Hold tight," He said, "Stay close to me, your struggles and trials are not over." I am grateful now, that He gave me those words, that I would have those words and Him to cling to. I didn't know it at the time, but 2014 would be even harder than 2013. And as I look back, I can see one thing very clearly, God was with me and I will remember that. He gave me Joshua 1:9 as my verse for 2014 and boy would it resonate in my soul through the year. "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." I will remember He was my strength and my comfort. I will remember that He was my firm foundation and my resting place. I will remember that His Word was the pillar of truth that all circumstances and situations would crash up against. And that He and His Word are faithful and true. I will remember how He gave me a testimony, sermon or devotion at just the right time, just when I needed to know I was doing the right thing and trusting Him with the outcome. I will remember that He allowed me the courage to stand firm and lovingly do the hard thing which is always the right thing. He allowed me the ability to let go and let God. And I will remember that He has brought me, "thus far". I will remember how He provided for us to go back to Zambia and how His hand was supernaturally present in all decisions there. I will remember how He allowed us to be encouraged and encourage others in Zambia; women on the streets and men in compounds. I will remember how He gave me a peace that passes all understanding despite what was going on at home. I will remember that He has called me and gifted me to do His work. See, He was faithful then and He is faithful now.

After taking time to reflect back, it is time to look forward. I will sit before my God and ask for His direction in moving into the new year. What word and verse does He want to gift to me? What goodness does He want to impart? I believe that He wants to give us more of Him, His presence in our lives. As I learned in December, I do not need to know the future or have security or safety, I just need more of Him. Again Lord, reveal more of You to me in this next year. And let us remember He is already in 2015!
Happy New Year everyone and I hope this new year is marked by more of Him in us!

Word for the Season-Reveal

In this wonderful season of celebrating the coming of our Lord to this earth, I always have a word that follows me around. It is a word that I try and see everything through.  A word I try to claim and understand more, a word I let God penetrate me with. That word this year is REVEAL.

To make known through divine inspiration; that is one of the definitions of reveal. It is a verb, an action. Something that happens in the spiritual realm between heaven and earth.

I feel like I have run across this word a lot lately and was pondering on this as December came close. Desiring revelations from God led me to pull back the curtain again on all of who He is. I wanted more.

We have been reading through the names of Jesus as one of our devotionals with our family over the past few weeks in a book from Nancy Leigh DeMoss, called the Wonder of His Name.  I realized that knowing and meditating on all these names would bring me to the revelation I wanted...more of Him. More of the completeness of who Jesus is. Each name has a specific meaning and application for us as believers and for the world. Truly accepting and resting in these names brings us to the fullness of what God wants us to know about His Son. He is the Good Shepherd, the Advocate, the Lion, the Lamb of God, I AM, the Chief Cornerstone, Messiah, Immanuel and many more.  There are 32 in all. They are powerful and reveal something that is deep and divine to my soul.

Ask God to reveal to you a name of His that you need to ponder on this Christmas Season. Is it Jesus, Light, King, The Truth, or Bridegroom? Let us worship all of Him this Christmas Season and share Him with others. The next definition of reveal which states-to show (something) plainly or clearly: to make (something that was hidden) able to be seen, is the perfect "next step". Let us make known and  unearth what is hidden and reveal to a lost world this season who Christmas is all about, the Savior of the world. If nothing else this year, understand this name. He came to save us from the wrath of God and our sins that separate us from eternity with Him. How wonderful the name. It has and will continue be an honor to represent this name in Africa as we go to bring Hope to a dark world.

True blessings from the Choitz Family and Merry Christmas!

Follow Me....

As I was worshiping this morning, I was pondering many things and thinking about the words of the song playing. The words went on and on..."illuminate the road before me, illuminate the road before me, illuminate the road before me", then the echo was, "follow me, follow me"...

Powerful words if we really think about them. If Jesus is willing to light our path, to illuminate the road before us, and He has gone before us to do that, what does that mean for us? I then started thinking about the willingness of following. If we follow, we follow where Jesus has gone and experience what He did. Are we willing to be what He asks of us in Acts 1:8? It states, "But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea, and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth."

No, I am not talking about going to the ends of the earth, that is the easy part. It is a word in the middle of the verse, "witnesses". Knowing that word actually means martyr, are we really willing to be "witnesses"? Are we willing to step over that line once and for all, not to falter and fade if times get tough? Are we willing to truly surrender to the sufferings of Christ? The world wants to light the way down many other roads, let us not be fooled by artificial light. May our hearts be pure and our minds set on Christ. That we may claim this saying from Spurgeon- "Far be it from us to seek a crown of honor where our Lord found only a crown of thorns." 

A Girl A Goal and her God, Part 2

I know I have not written in a while, of which I am so sorry about! It has been a little crazy around here. I believe though, that I was waiting to write today about yesterday. Yesterday, October 12th 2014 was the Chicago Marathon. The long awaited, much trained for, bucket list making, Chicago Marathon. I ran not only to check this item off my bucket list, but for a purpose, a reason. I ran for Zambia.

I ran for the women. The women I have known for years. The women who inspire me. The women who have faith I can not hold a candle to.  Women who have overcome so much just in their daily living. Women who desire change for their communities and a different future for their children.

As I ran, I prayed. I prayed for Mary and I thought about Precious who died. I prayed for our Agness and prayed for Justine. I prayed for all of the women who have come to know Christ at our women's conferences. I prayed for Ennie who walked into our women's conference off the street crying and distraught and came to know Jesus in a small room with Sandy and Joyce Sakala and I. I prayed for our partners on the ground and for Chongwe, where we are going to live. It was an honor and a privilege to run and think of them.

I knew it was going to get hard. I knew I would struggle. I knew I would have to overcome my legs and feet telling me to please stop running. I knew this was about pushing myself. About running with my running partner, Jesus. I knew He would have to help me. And I knew He would be there to do it. I had set a goal to finish under the 5 hour mark. I had my running app on but it was not matching up to the mile markers on the course, so I stopped listening to it. I was not sure really what my time was when I hit mile 13 then mile 20 and then mile 25. I just kept running. Well, after I saw the video of me running at mile 25 that my husband took, it looked more like a painful shuffle but I told myself, I was not going to quit. If the women in Zambia do not quit, neither do I! I wanted so badly to hit my goal, though. I knew it was going to be close. I got to mile 26 and on my playlist, my favorite song came on, Fill Me Up, by Jesus Culture. I could not believe it. I went up that stupid hill over the bridge to attack the last .2 miles. It gave me that extra energy to finish strong as I lifted my hands up to Heaven and praised God as I crossed that world famous finish line. I did not know what my official time was at this point but I was thanking God for all He had done.

I thought about that today as I was praying this morning. He reminded me that when we praise Him and trust Him, He will take care of the rest. That when our goals line up with His will, He will come through. He reminded me that our goal to leave next Spring and move to Zambia is also His goal. He will come through. For this is His plan and He can make it happen. What an awesome God we serve.
Oh, and my official time.....4:59:26.

A GIRL A GOAL AND HER GOD

On my run in Chongwe

When I started to train for this marathon I was very determined to try and run with people so I would be consistent and well, who am I kidding, that they would force me to get out of bed at the crack of dawn. BUT I have had many long runs by myself and they have been sweet, wonderful times with my God. This time with God has been overwhelming, convicting, and has almost brought me to my knees on occasions for different reasons. This morning was one of those times. I feel so blessed to be able to run, to watch the sun come up over the trees, to have music in my ears while just running for fun. Unlike most of the rest of the women in the world, who run not FOR anything but FROM things. Grateful for the time spent praying for the women of the world, for Zambia and for my friends and family. I am also grateful for the biggest blessing, a running partner that always shows up to run with me, no matter how early or how hot, My Jesus.

I had the opportunity to run with Him in Chongwe, Zambia just a couple of weeks ago (don't worry it was safe there!). This was so amazing! I took it all in, the sun, the dust, the people milling about, the stray dogs enjoying the cool morning air, and the very real feeling that this is going to be my home. A new home, a new place to run, a new life. 

This goal of running a marathon is such a great parallel for my goal of finishing well this race called life. It is my goal to do God's will for my life and walk with Him along the way and hear him say one day when the race is over, well done my good and faithful servant.